In the olden times, it is very common to hear parents tell their children to do something because “I told you so” or “This is correct because I say so.”
Whenever a younger person try to correct an elder, they will be deemed as rude and disrespectful. Many parents adopt a “holier-than-thou” approach and their ego gets in the way when being told on a better way to do things or if their error was being highlighted. This is against the teachings of Islam which encourages us to question and not to follow blindly.
Allah says in the Holy Quran:
Surah Al-Kahf: 50
“And (remember) when We said to the angels: ‘Prostrate yourselves unto Adam.’ So they prostrated themselves except ‘Iblis’ (Satan). He was one of the jinn; he disobeyed the command of his Lord” (Quran, Surah Al-Kahf: 50).
Surah Al-Baqarah: 34
“….And they prostrated except Iblis (Satan), he refused and was proud and was one of the disbelievers (disobedient to Allah)” (Quran, Surah Al-Baqarah: 34).
Satan’s arrogance – reinforced by his false logic, and jealousy – prevented him from obeying Allah’s command.
As Allah tells us in the Quran, Satan said,
“I am better than him (Adam), You created me from fire, and him You created from clay” (Quran, Surah Al-Aaraf: 12)
Life is a constant learning process for all of us, young and old and it is only right for us to admit our mistakes where deemed fit and necessary. It will make the children respect us even more and thus mirror our actions. The best way to teach our children good values is to practice them ourselves.
Throughout Islamic history and in Islamic literature, the rights and responsibilities pertaining to children are clear cut. Parents, families, and communities have certain responsibilities towards children. Many of them are obligatory, and on the Day of Judgement, God will question adults about the treatment of their children. A child is a blessing, and not a possession.
We must therefore empower children to do and say the right things. There are ways for children to gently nudge an adult towards doing better good, without the need to be disrespectful. Adults should never feel challenged just because a younger person highlights our mistake.
There was one morning when I woke up to do Fajr’ prayers and my 4-year-old daughter came into my room, happily telling me that the angels have woken her up to do her morning prayers. I usually do not have the heart to wake her up for Fajr’ as she is still so young although she has consistently reminded me to so and so one day, I told her to make duaa before she sleep and Allah will arrange for angels to wake her up.
After Fajr’ prayers, I was feeling a little sleepy and wanted to go back to sleep but my daughter reminded me not to go back to sleep until after sunrise. She said that ‘Malaikat Mikael’ wants to give us ‘rezeki’ and it is sunnah for us to make supplications or read the Quran after Fajr’. She was basically repeating my words to her right back at me. That was when I realised the weightage of my words on my children and that I should always ‘walk the talk’. I apologised to her and thank her for reminding me.
There were other times that I shared with her that I am not perfect for I am only human. Only Allah is perfect but that does not mean I can use that as a convenient excuse to do wrong. I requested for her to remind me if Syaitan’s whispers get to me and I start losing my temper with my children because Syaitan loves to influence us humans to do bad. I am thankful that Allah has gifted me with such a responsible and thoughtful child. My child is my SUPERHERO!
CCLL 3’s theme this year will be “I AM A SUPERHERO”. Let’s build a generation of SUPERHEROES who are good Muslims together. Insya’allah!
Look out for more details of the stage programmes and vendors involved for CCLL 3!
Meanwhile, MARK YOUR CALENDARS!
Date: 29th Jul 2017
Time: 1 to 6pm
Venue: Mujahidin Mosque Auditorium Level 4 (beside MDIS)